Another Reflection upon the Absurdity of Hell

I am extremely disenchanted with Christianity due to the easy answers about hell or the malicious, inhuman depictions of it. Actually, I now identity as an agnostic because I just cannot rationally believe that one religion amongst an innumerable amount of other religious interpretations could be the paved road to heaven. It ignores our complex minds which are fraught with doubt. The idea of confident belief in something transcendent and unknowable makes the idea of blistering eternity for those who doubt even minimally seem both unreasonable and even sadistic.

I am afflicted with scrupulosity therefore the entire notion of hell was a mind poison for me. Once I started unraveling the logistical problems of it and the paradoxes it formed, I no longer could believe truthfully within superficial Christianity unless I feigned belief. But, what human could really control ever aspect of their minds when all of us view and synthesize thoughts and observations differently? If that is true, then why would we exempt certain people from hell just because someone had the best genetic predisposition towards having decisive beliefs in this vast number of mostly human created doctrines about the metaphysical world.

Also, I cannot honestly believe that any denizen of heaven could live peacefully with the knowledge that the people we love are in hell. Yet, some Christians cruelly denounce you for being too sentimental. But really, I must wonder if then God has some underlying prejudice towards those who are empathetic. I certainly cannot abide by a God's rules if that God was unforgiving towards the errors within my friend's thoughts or beliefs. This God that would cruelly punish those that see God differently and beyond the human construct would be called a sociopath within our reality.

Some forms of Christianity also have informed women who have shown to desire spiritual leadership roles to be hell bound. Recently, a well-admired priest in the Catholic church was excommunicated for showing support for women priests. Symbolically, the church felt that his views were heretical and adverse to God's laws. In many ways, these Christians would thus say that this priest was no longer bound to heaven.

Other Christian sects see this as a non-issue and therefore would not believe it to factor into God's decision upon whether we are to go to hell or not.

Essentially, the whole idea of hell was created all for the sake of preserving order in an agrarian culture. Also, it is a Machiavellian concept that insures believers a passage to heaven if they repent a certain prescribed number of times for certain vices. More importantly, every Christian has a different notion as to who goes to hell. Furthermore, we have varying ideas of things that are dictated by sins. Also, we tend to blindly vilify those who are aberrations. Instead of treating them kindly, we sentence them to hell in our minds because they do not fit within the social context of the church community. Essentially, this makes religion more similar to a society with certain conventions rather than a community fit for a being that cannot be bound to a litany of absurd doctrines.

Overall, I forbid myself to be unloving all for the sake coercing people into a human-created belief structure that certifies them eternal life. Also, I am disgusted by my former self-destructive thought process that kept me focused on only my salvation. In the end, Christianity was about creating a perfected visage that expressed doubt-free belief within doctrines I tricked my mind into believing. But when I really examined my beliefs, I felt filled with sin. Soon enough, a vicious cycle overtook where all my dreams and artistic thoughts were repressed all for the sake of forcing myself to believe in superficial, unprovable religious doctrines. Should I and other inquisitive people be condemned to hell just because we're wired to be artistic and unconventional thinkers? Are we to believe that God preordains people to hell based upon certain dispositions? How can anyone believe in this madness? Why would anyone forswear their right to love others or to humbly accept that God is an enigma just to have some earthbound religious structure acknowledge that you are destined to heaven?

Why should Christians believe ardently within something as cruel as a hell for the doubters or those whose thoughts about God deviate from the rest? Are we likening God to the most pettiest of school bullies? Basically if your theology is fallacious then you do not just get a bad grade and another chance for reexamination, you will be punished eternally for failing to perfectly conceptualize a supreme being in your human mind.